I am here to serve as one thing and one thing only: an assassin. This being said, I do not want to boast about the brave, daring and freakishly brutal kill I made today on this 14th day of November and my wingman will instead tell the tale.

The day started out like any normal day; I went to classes and then ate lunch. After lunch, however, I found out that I would be accompanying Mr. “Yogurt” on his mission. We departed around 3:40pm. It was a gloomy time of day, and the rain was heard pitter- pattering down on our heads as we headed toward Krannert Art Museum. Mr. Kevin Hong was scheduled to leave around 3:50pm from his previous class, and we were there for the stake out. As the students began filing out of the building, we began our walk toward them. Yogurt was 5 paces ahead of me, and when he saw Hong he tapped his right leg, indicating that Hong was near. I quickly yelled “Hey Kevin!” (as Yogurt was already behind him) to verify that that was our target. Kevin looked up and replied with a curt “hi.” Now the assassin crept up behind and viscously struck at Hong’s back, as well as his chest to confirm the kill and the look on Hong’s face was one of pure devastation. His next words uttered were “oh dang! It’s over already?” “Yep,” Yogurt replied, “and that’s that.”